REVIEW: FRED ☆☆☆☆

Venue: The Pavilion, Cork, Ireland.

After 15 years, 4 albums, numerous members and many good times; Fred the band have decided to call it a day. The decision was accompanied not by grief, but by a celebration of life. A 'fun'eral. A number of testimonials were held around the country; Dublin, Galway, Clonakilty and Cork City amongst them.

The Last Hoorah, as it was known, was a resounding success for the resigning band. I attended the second-last hoorah, December 27th (it has taken me so long to write this blog due to the cocktail of inebriation and poisonous hangover that is Christmastime) in the Pav, Cork. An early show, scheduled purely to accommodate the fan-girling, pathetic fans desperate to see the band perform one last time.

Songs were dragged up from repertoire lists long forgotten, albums of old and tunes of late. Band members down through the ages were summoned to the stage, and the nostalgia was roaring. The gig finished with all attributes of Fred on the stage (spilling over the edges) and the crowd, chanting 'Two Million People Can't Be Wrong'; a momentous moment.

It's hard to believe this Corkonian band that we're all so proud of have packed it in, for once and for all. All the same, a (reassuring) voice in my head says that this won't be the last of Fred the band.......

It can't be, right??

REVIEW: INDIEPENDENCE ☆☆☆☆

Venue: Deer Farm, Mitschelstown, Cork, Ireland.

August 2nd-4th, 2013



INDIEPENDENCE. A small Music & Arts Festival, nominated for 'Best Small Festival' at European Awards 2013.

 'The Farm', as it's fondly known, is absolutely ideal for a festival of it's kind. 

• The ground is flat, and the earth is pretty absorbing (i.e. it'll take a nice bit of downpour before your tent goes the full Titanic). Something to do with the mountainous Galtee region it lies in.....or something that sounds a lot cooler than what I just said.
• There are lots (and lots and lots) of trees- behind which one can escape the dreaded port-a-loos, or just escape in general. 
• The campsites are spread out and well signposted, for when you've been kicked out of the main arena at 4am and you realise that everyone else went with the cheapest possible option of tent in the Argos catalogue too.

The Arena was totally diverse, there was something for absolutely everybody -

even this guy.

• The Canadian Main Stage was where all the 'big acts' played. By 'big acts' I mean headliners such as De La Soul, The Fratellis, Bell X1, Bastille, Kodaline; the list goes on.
• The Maxol Big Top Stage, a circus tent, essentially, housed the likes of Beardyman (AMAAAZING), And So I Watch You From Afar and Hudson Taylor.
• Bacardi Oakheart Arena (who, for the record, made a damn good mojito) and the Darkness Graveyard catered for the dance/house/techno lunatics within us all, the latter being more.....well, "Darkness Graveyard"-y.
• The Bier Halle- complete with Oktoberfest benches- was my personal favourite. Upside down umbrellas decorated the ceiling, the acts were mainly unsigned, up-and-coming bands (such as Walking On Cars).
• The Hot Press Tent interviewed most of the line-up in front of whoever wanted to come along could do so. (Not to be recommended when it's 2 o' clock in the afternoon, you're still drunk, and the most intelligent thing you can thing of saying to the Fratellis is 'The Fratellis are so-'*runs away*)
• There was also a Silent Disco- which you should totally consider sneaking into without headphones and dancing in the silence- it is practically an outer-body experience. Or so I'm told.

Even the food was top class.

Cleverly, I bought an early-bird ticket, so the whole weekend only cost me €70.

As goes with the territory, festivals are pretty objective. 
So while I had the time of my life, and did some pretty ridiculous stuff, and would recommend it wholeheartedly- not everybody would agree, and there were some downsides too.

• The port-a-loos were di-sgust-ing. I understand that it is nobody's fault (apart from those charming sink vomiters) but jeeesus, they were septic. 
• I was unsure/uncomfortable with the presence of the family campsite/the kids, running around with earmuffs on. I mean, really?? Is your 4 year old son going to thank you for seeing drunken twenty-something-year-old-guys declaring their love for each other in a pile of vomit and Canadian beer glasses?
• There weren't enough bad points to make my bullet-pointed argument seem necessary. This is unacceptable, please adhere to this complaint for next year.

Overall, it was sheer brilliance. The lineup, while nothing spectacular, had some real diamonds. It was the extra touches, the "festivities" that really made it stand out. Check out www.indiependencefestival.com, and keep an eye on when early bird tickets for next year go onsale.

It's definitely worth the gamble. 

My name is Jess; and I am a Gig Pig.

My name is Jess; and I am a Gig Pig.

The first step is admitting it.

It'll take courage, willpower, familial support, and an acceptance of your ATM being constantly overdrawn. 

Not sure what I'm talking about? Never fear; Jess is near. Who said internet diagnosis was unreliable?

• Have you used the expression "They might never play in *insert city where said band will most definitely reappear at* again!!?"
• Do you find yourself equating restaurant meal prices to gig tickets?
• Have tried to make someone go to an event with you that you described as "that guy that plays that thing with the hair and the eyes in a venue only 4 hours and 2 buses away from our house"??
• Is your alcohol consumtion indirecty proportional to how much you like what you're listening to?
• Do you have recurring nightmares that that album you've been listening to on repeat just won't sound the same live?
• Do you feel anxious that somehow everyone else knows that your last question refers to AM and that they'll judge you for it?
• Do you feel IRRATIONAL ANGER towards GIG CUDDLERS that LITERALLY COULD HAVE STAYED AT HOME and CUDDLED THERE instead of in the front row?
• Have you ever sympathetically offered to take over for the barman for a few minutes, 'cause he was really missing out on a fantastic night, it didn't seem fair, his manager wouldn't have noticed, and no, I didn't need to be escorted out by security; I was just trying to be nice.
• Do you choose to ignore that almost everyone in the music industry is a knob and choose to accept that, actually; if he ever met you, Glen Hansard would be totally interested in your university course, and actually; Winston Marshall really fancies you.
• Have you had regular doctors appointments/funerals on Friday mornings for the past while now?
• Is your love/hate relationship with ticketmaster.ie really upsetting the feng shui in your flat?

(I'm sorry, I take back that last one. Just don't cut me off. I need the hit, come on, I'm sorry, just don't cut me off. I don't care about your ridiculous booking fees, I just wish you'd  advertise at the actual price, not the profit you're making on it. But please, don't cut me off, I'll have the money soon, I swear.)

If you have answered yes to any of the above questions....then I think you and I will get along just fine.